| Celebrating A Life Shared |
Not everyone will want or need to write their
own book, but if you are now reading this, you probably have a desire to find
a way to tell your own story. It is from that place you should start –
the story you know so well.
Don’t worry about where it ends or what form it eventually takes, just start to write.
But first some words of advice. This journey is unlike any other. Before we experience a significant loss in our lives, most of us do what we can to avoid feelings of pain and hurt. If certain thoughts or actions cause us pain, we typically at least try to adjust our thoughts and/or behaviors to avoid the hurt. This journey through grief will not work that way. In order to heal you need to process your loss, and pain is part of that process. Should you choose to write your story, it will likely be the most difficult thing you have ever chosen to do. It is good to keep this in mind as you begin.
Also, you will need a strong sense of purpose to persevere. Make sure you know why you are choosing this road Fix this purpose in your heart and mind. If you are really serious, tell others what you are doing. Pick one or more people in your circle to hold you accountable to the goal you have set for yourself.
But in the end, give yourself permission to take this journey in your own unique way. Write in the time and space that works best for you. Still holding that thought, here are some possible topics to help you get started:
Don’t worry about where it ends or what form it eventually takes, just start to write.
But first some words of advice. This journey is unlike any other. Before we experience a significant loss in our lives, most of us do what we can to avoid feelings of pain and hurt. If certain thoughts or actions cause us pain, we typically at least try to adjust our thoughts and/or behaviors to avoid the hurt. This journey through grief will not work that way. In order to heal you need to process your loss, and pain is part of that process. Should you choose to write your story, it will likely be the most difficult thing you have ever chosen to do. It is good to keep this in mind as you begin.
Also, you will need a strong sense of purpose to persevere. Make sure you know why you are choosing this road Fix this purpose in your heart and mind. If you are really serious, tell others what you are doing. Pick one or more people in your circle to hold you accountable to the goal you have set for yourself.
But in the end, give yourself permission to take this journey in your own unique way. Write in the time and space that works best for you. Still holding that thought, here are some possible topics to help you get started:
- What did we get right in our relationship and what did we get wrong?
- My favorite memories of you are...
- Your qualities I most admire are...
- Apologies: I want to
tell you I am sorry
Thank you's — I didn’t tell you (or tell you enough) - Regrets: If only...
- Questions for the one you grieve
- Questions for God
- This I Believe —(From a 1950's NPR radio program wherein people from all walks of life shared the personal philosophies and core values that guided their daily lives)
- There will be times when you are either stuck or simply feeling that you cannot keep going.
- Use pictures, cards to jog your memory and to evoke themes. Simply record the facts write biography without the pressure of commentary. Ask others to share their stories and memories — you are not alone in your grief. Write anyway — put judgment aside and commit a time slot. Come back to your why, to your purpose.
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